10 Memes Every Writer Should Love

Still nursing a hangover?

Pop a couple of aspirin, drink a Bloody Mary, listen to our St. Patrick's Day podcast, and enjoy these 10 memes that the Writer’s Bone crew found at the bottom of their Guinness pints.

We know memes aren’t the greatest forms of communication ever invented; however, we freely admit that we love them and share them on our social media channels as often as possible.

Feel free to share your favorites in the comments section or tweet us @WritersBone.

For posts from The Boneyard, check out our full archive.

Read Me, I’m Irish: Inspiration From Irish Writers

Are there better writer companions than those featured above?

By Daniel Ford

You know what goes great with St. Patrick’s Day? A clip from The West Wing.

Now that I got that out of my system—and added a few pints of Guinness and a few shots of Jameson to it—I can share with you these bursts of inspirations from Irish writers.

Feel free to add to our collection of quotes, memes, and videos—many of the videos are from CUNY TV’s excellent series on Irish writers in America—in the comment section or by tweeting us @WritersBone.

Please, we encourage you to write while drinking heavily today, and edit with the aid of Bloody Mary’s tomorrow.

Irishman Jonathan Swift has the first word:

For posts from The Boneyard, check out our full archive.

On the Writer’s Road: Places We Love to Write

New York City's Central Park isn't a bad place to spend some time writing.

Sometimes when and where you write is just as important as what you write. The Writer’s Bone

crew got together and discussed the best places to seduce their creative muses. To add to the fun, our contributors also revealed which fictional character they'd like to be and why.

Daniel Ford: There comes a point every night where I think I’m ready to sleep. The lights are out. There’s a shitty movie or television show in the background. My eyes are heavy with sleep. And then bam! My muse is on her second coffee and she won’t be denied. A couple of things could happen next. I could walk over to where my laptop is on my kitchen table, open it and type out some thoughts with one eye open and my headphones blaring music into my ears. I could also unbury my cell phone from the depths of my covers and type a few notes before actually falling asleep. I could pull out my reporter’s notebook and turn on my reading light and write notes out longhand. Whatever the case, I’m waking up from whatever pseudo-slumber I was in to get those words out of my head. And then waking up early the next morning without an alarm clock to craft them into something someone might actually read.

I’ve always said that I would be Atticus Finch from To Kill A Mockingbird, but I’ve been thinking about Richard Russo’s Nobody’s Fool recently and I think I’d like to be Sully for a day. Just an unlucky, crotchety old man who is trying to hold his life together in a deadbeat town in upstate New York. I often imagine Sully as who my main character Sid Sanford would be as an old man. As much as I love Atticus, I love characters that are gray, so Sully is my pick at the moment. But ask me again tomorrow and you could get a different answer.

Daniel Ford's regular writing station. He was live-tweeting the Oscars in this picture.

Sean Tuohy: I have to say, I do not have a favorite place to write. If I can sit down and write I will. I don't like writing in public. I have never understood how people can study or write while at Starbucks. I need to be a room with a view and that's all I really need. A lot of times I am writing in my head. I think about scenes, dialogue, and characters while just walking around. My head is always going. I always get ideas when I wake up in the morning or just before going to bed. Just last night I left an open notebook by my head to jot down some ideas before I went to bed. It worked out well. Something about the time just before sleep and just after waking up is the best time. The juices in your mind are set just right and allow you to write.

I want to say James Bond. I would be Fleming's version of Bond: cold, brooding, drinking, and smoking a ton. That Bond tended to muse about life and he was a guy who really disliked his job in a way. He was always hoping M would fire him or wanted to leave, but at the same time the thrill of the work kept him there. Also, he was a spy during the Cold War. Just think about the global chess game that was being played by the Americans and Russians. That was awesome.

Stephanie Schaefer: I’m a creature of comfort so it’s no surprise I like to write in cozy locations. Unlike most of the other writers here, I can’t listen to music while try to find my voice—It’s just me and my thoughts. I’ll take breaks every so often to listen to a song to jolt my energy, but as Daniel knows I usually make him put on headphones when we’re writing in the same room (Sorry!). I’m also big on sunlight, so in an ideal world I’d have a corner office with huge windows (A girl can dream), but in reality any window-side nook will do. Add a warm cup of tea (or the occasional glass of wine) to the mix and that’s my writing oasis.

My initial pick would be Carrie Bradshaw, if only for her closet and book deals. But on second thought, her love life is a little too dramatic and seems tiring. On a less superficial note, I’d probably choose “Skeeter” from The Help, a young journalist who attempts to expose the truth through her writing.

Rachel Tyner: My favorite place to write is anywhere I am alone. I cannot write in front of anyone, I'm convinced they are reading over my shoulder and judging. I get the most/best work done when I have had a lot of caffeine and am feeling really passionate about something. That being said I really feel like I need to put the disclaimer here and say that I don't write very often. Words don't pour out of me, it is not my passion. I journal fairly regularly, and there have been times growing up and even recently that I've wished I could publish a novel, but I certainly don't have the enthusiasm for it to make it my career. There have been a few of your guests on the Writer's Bone recently who have given similar advice along the lines of "write if you must" and "if you can physically do something else do it." For you, this probably reassures you that you are pursuing the right career for yourself. That is so wonderful! For me, it is reassuring because I realize that while it would be cool to see my name on the cover of a published book...I just don't care enough to get it there.

I would be Hermione Granger. My parents, grandmother, and JK Rowling raised me. Hermione is strong, brave, a good friend, and a genius. Plus, she came from a non-magical family but was lucky enough to be magical herself, which is kind of the dream amiright? I’m still waiting on my letter from Hogwarts.

Matt DiVenere: My favorite place to write is anywhere with a laptop and my headphones. But the room has to be dark with just one light on, like a desk lamp or something. It reminds me of my late nights at the newspaper designing pages and wrapping up stories before deadlines. And, of course, the best time for me as a writer is any time after 9 p.m. If you try to get me to write a sentence before noon, you're only setting yourself up for failure.

I'm not sure what main character I would be. I’d probably be any one of the baseball players from any of Matt Christopher’s books. They always overcome the odds and find success. And they were fun books growing up as a kid.

Emili Vesilind (Editor-in-chief for Washington Flyer): My favorite place to write is at a nice, tall table at any coffee shop — with headphones blasting loud, electro-y music...all day. I get the most done after coffee no. 2 (ingested around 2pm). I am cooking from 2:30-5:30!

If you could be any of your favorite main characters (from your favorite novels or something you've written), who would it be and why?

I'm afraid I'm most like Lily Bart in The House of Mirth—a luxury-loving creature on a meager budget! But I aspire to be Tina Fey every day.

Lindsey Wojcik (future Writer’s Bone contributor): I always keep a notebook in my purse, which gives me the freedom to discover a new favorite place to write any time I'm feeling inspired. I suppose a short answer would be New York City at sunset. When I've had a particularly hard day at the office and need a place to escape, I let the sun be my guide to where I'll eventually sit down to write. The parks along the Hudson River give the best sunset views, so in the spring and summer on a nice afternoon I often find myself at the High Line or Hudson River Park with my shades on, music blasting in my headphones, and a crisp, blank notebook page staring back at me ready to be filled with words. Being in a public setting with no distractions forces me to sit and write until my heart is content. New York's urban landscape never fails to inspire, and I find writing with the beat of the city generates the most creativity. I often pause to watch the beauty of the sun disappear behind the horizon, which is usually my cue to head home. I always revisit my raw handwritten workdays or even weeks after I've scribed my thoughts in my notebook to formulate and revise it into a hard and final copy. The sense memory of writing in whatever setting I found myself drives the final piece and makes it so much easier to sit at my computer to write.

I'd love to see America through Sal Paradise's eyes. Sal—Jack Kerouac's alter ego in On the Road—is a free spirit (more so than I am) looking for the meaning of life in the late 1940s and early 1950. On his quest, he takes several cross-country trips with his carefree friend Dean Moriarty and becomes enlightened by the people he meets that—like himself—do not fit in with society's standards. How amazing would it be to discover the hidden talents and cultures of America in that era? Oh, and Sal is a writer. He's the embodiment of everything I am not and part of who I am. I'd like to take a ride as Sal.

Lindsey Wojcik's writing spot on the High Line in New York City.

9-year-old author Elizabeth Nicklis: I like to write in my room sometimes at my desk, sometimes on my bed. Before lunch is my best time, after schoolwork, but before lunch.

And hmm…I'd probably like to be…hmm…that's a hard decision. I'd like to be Erik in Wild Life by Cyntia DeFelice because he has a hunting dog that he found and he gets to hunt with his uncle's gun and live off the prairie for five days. That would be awesome. I'd love to be him.

Elizabeth writing with cuddly friends.

For posts from The Boneyard, check out our full archive.

Chinese Buffet: Fat Action Heroes

Daniel Ford and Sean Tuohy talk about their favorite action movies after their podcast with David Morrell.

For more videos from Writer's Bone, check out our YouTube channel.

The Boneyard: Why Being A Good Reader Will Make You A Good Writer

The Boneyard features the best of the Writer’s Bone crew's daily email chain. Yes, we broadened the definition of “best” to make this happen.

What the lobby will look like at Writer's Bone's future office.

Daniel Ford: Here's the problem I've had recently. I can't read one thing at a time. I blame beign in grad school and having to read a bunch of stuff all the time. I'll get hooked on something and then flutter back to something else. I finally finished a bunch of stuff I had been reading for most of 2013, but now the pattern has started again. I mentioned I was reading to Sean at one point I was reading Colonel Roosevelt by Edmund Morris (which I just finished!), but really, I’m also reading:

• Johnny Carson, Henry Bushkin 
• The Goldfinch, Donna Tartt
• Inferno, Max Hastings
• Up in the Old Hotel, Joseph Mitchell
• On Writing, Stephen King

Plus, I have a stack of books that I've been trying not to crack yet, including:

• Means of Ascent (The Years of Lyndon Johnson), Robert Caro 
• Lawrence in Arabia: War, Deceit, Imperial Folly and the Making of the Modern Middle East, Scott Anderson 
• Coolidge, Amity Shlaes 
• The Guns at Last Light, The War in Western Europe, 1944-1945 (The Liberation Trilogy), Rick Atkinson

Okay, fine, I also have a ton of books on my Kindle that are in various states of being read. How often do you read and what is your reading process like?

Sean Tuohy: Mother lover, I read every day. I have to read something or I feel like a junkie who hasn't gotten his fix for the day. I read on the bus going to work in the morning, on the bus going home, and then I try to fit in between half an hour to an hour of reading time before passing out. But I can’t read one book at a time. At the moment, I am reading three books and I have more on the list.

Rachel Tyner: I am always in the middle of multiple books. Right now it is Cuckoo's Calling, The Boss of You (about owning your own business), and a “Charmed” comic book Sean got me (don't tell anyone). I also began and abandoned some books too, which I do intend to go back to, including A Clash of Kings, The Birth of Venus, The Hunt for Red October, Primary Colors, among others.

Wow, this is making me depressed.

My problem with reading is that it is not an activity that you can multitask. I am in the car for three hours a day, and if I want to survive I can't exactly read while in traffic. I usually get home and want to clean, and so I can put on Netflix (or the latest Writer's Bone podcast!) and be productive.

It is such a leisurely, wonderful activity, reading, but I find that I only really sit down to read when I have nothing else I feel like I need to do or comes above it on my priorities. I definitely will make it a goal going forward to read more every day. In 2014, it is my goal to finish all of the books on the list above. No excuses!

Daniel: Okay, fine, I’ll admit it. I’m also reading The Unnamed, a book by Joshua Farris about a guy who can’t stop walking, Hunter S. Thompson’s The Rum Diary, Elmore Leonard’s Rum Punch, and Craig Johnson’sThe Cold Dish.

I’m sucked in to pretty much every one. I have a serious problem.

But you know what? The more I read, the more I want to write. And the more I write, the more I feel like a writer. The more I feel like a writer, the less scotch I have to consume.

How does reading affect your writing? And what is it about Elmore Leonard that makes his prose so irresistible to the point you abandon all other reads and devour each morsel of hardboiled goodness (sorry, I’m sucked into Rum Punch at the moment)?

Dave Pezza: I am a large proponent of studying literature. I don't mean that in the contemporary liberal arts sense of study. Like anything else, you and learn your craft, and then you apply what you have learned. Writing, I feel, is the same way. You read as much as you can and absorb as much as you can. For me, writing and reading have always gone hand in hand. When I am reading a lot and reading more difficult authors or books is most definitely comes out in my writing. Dialogue, diction, syntax, they all naturally draw from your influences. That is how Ernest Hemingway changed American prose. Everyone began to read Hemingway, he became an institution, and more writers naturally absorbed the style.

As far as Leonard is concerned, he is one of the few authors who managed to successfully walk the tightrope between literature and entertainment. He is easy to read, mostly. His themes are rather pulpy. At face value, Leonard should be a dime novel author, but his simplicity isn't derived from lack of skill or thematic development. Leonard writes the American spirit well, the individual well. His characters, for the most part, are simple people, and I mean that in no offensive way. They're motivations and emotions are easily grasped or empathized with or judged. That's why he is easy to devour, he gives you the best of both words. A little crime, a few shootouts, but you still walk away with more than when you started page one.

Daniel: Sean and I talk about libraries in the video that we posted earlier this morning. Our staff consists of some of the younger members of the Millennial generation (you bastards), so do any of you have any memories of going to the library? What are your best and worst experiences related to the library?

Also, Here’s something I just read in Rum Punch that ties into our conversation:

“He said, ‘You name it. We’re living in the arms capital of America, South Florida. You can buy an assault rifle here in less time than it takes to get a library card.’”

Stephanie Schaefer: I loved going to the library. I remember when it was your birthday as a kid you got to "donate" a book to my school library (aka your parents paid for it and you got to put your name in it). Since I have a summer birthday, I donated a book before the end of school. All I remember is that it had ducks wearing rain boots on the cover.

And my town library used to host teddy bear picnics...badass.

Matt DiVenere: Ohhhh, the library. Let's see. In elementary school, my mom signed me up for the reading club that they had. I was able to borrow two books a week for the entire summer, and every time I read a book, I got a prize. I also got a star sticker next to my name on the bulletin board (of course this was the real reason why I was reading, to brag about how many stars I had.). I'm pretty sure I just gave away some of those prizes to my uncle for my cousins to enjoy.

My worst experience would be going to my high school "library" where we spent two hours learning the Dewey decimal system in order to get our books. Clearly, everyone in class already knew it, but it was mandatory to go to this workshop. In high school, the library was either a place to catch up on some sleep between periods or a quick route from one side of the building to the other without having to go all the way around and past all of the teachers. It's two hours that I will never get back in all of my life.

Sadly, I wouldn't go back to a library again until I had to cover an event that happened at a town library in Vermont. It was a local historian group discussing plans for an upcoming parade. That's the last time I've ever been in a library.

Dave: Libraries are paramount of successful democratic culture. The state pays for and operates a free facility dedicated to learning and self-empowerment. Amazing, even in 2014. I had a very close relationship with the Cranston Public Library in Cranston, R.I. as a youngster. I would frequent it on a regular basis, borrowing books and VHS movies, and was even part of a young reader's group there. This early relationship is most likely the reason for my fascination with the mysterious Dewey decimal system and the physical joy I feel when I step into a library or a book store; the sheer amount of knowledge contained in those locations awe me.

Amount a year ago I was coaching volleyball at my old high school and realized I have never been inside the Warwick Public Library, a place I had driven by countless times over the years. At the time I was also interested in writing a pseudo-fictional account of the 1st Rhode Island Regiment's involvement in the Battle of Bunker Hill, and I was scouring Rhode Island libraries for sources. I hadn't used my card in so long that I needed to renew. Admittedly, I don't use the library often. I tend to buy my books now. I like my bookcases in my home with my books, and I like to annotate when I read. It is most likely that we will lose libraries soon, which is a marker of the failure of democracy. I wish there was a way to signify their importance in the digital age, but I can't for the life of me think of a reason why. Could you imagine the Boston library empty of all that knowledge, like a cobra without its venom?

Also, without libraries, my hot, redheaded librarian fantasy also fades away into the realm of impossible. I'll be a very sad man/boy the day that happens. Hopefully it never will.

Sean: That Leonard statement is very true.

Look, when I say South Florida has comic-like crimes I'm not kidding. It’s kind of like the land of misfit toys down there…if all the toys were doing lines of cocaine and buying M4 rifles.

It takes about two to four weeks to get your concealed weapons permit in Florida and that's mostly waiting time. You have to do a four-hour gun safety course, sign some paperwork, and then get finger printed and photographed. You mail this off—along with a $117 check—and in return you get an ID back with your picture and the right to carry a gun.

"Concealed" is a broad word in Florida. I could take my pistol, put it in a zip lock fanny pack, go to a restaurant, and then put the gun holding pack on the table while eating. I have seen that happen before! The man came in with his family, set the pack on the table, and downed chicken wings while watching the FSU game. He freely admitted to having the gun in the pack. This was all within the law.

I decided to get my permit when I was 21. I had a friend who gave me the card for a man named "Chuck" and said his course was only $50, which was $25 less than most places. Yes, my gun safety class was done on the cheap. I showed up at a private gun range and was welcomed in to a nicely outfitted trailer by a man in his fifties with grey hair and a big smile. He stuck out his hand, which I took in to mine and discovered he did not have a thumb. No thumb! Just a stump of what was left on his hand. Mind you in his other hand was a freshly opened can of beer. Chuck it turns out was a Vietnam vet who had been an ex this and ex that. He was an all-around nice guy and a guy who knew his guns.

I know what you are thinking. He got his thumb taken off in ‘Nam, right? Yeah, that didn't happen. Turns out it gotten taken off at the gun range years after ‘Nam. I don't know the details of what happened. Now, I am sitting down at a table with a thumb-less gun safety teacher who is drinking his third beer in less than an hour and the other student who was a woman in her fifties, too much make up, talked about her cats a lot, wore a t-shirt from the musical “Cats,” and was getting a gun permit because her ex beat her up and she wanted to shoot him.

I am going to skip over the part where the teacher pulled out a .45 from a briefcase randomly, the part where the woman showed pictures of her black and blue body post-beating, and the part where the teacher and the woman start hitting on one another. Now, remember when I said the course was four hours? This class was 89 minutes long. He skipped over everything, told some stories, and then gave me some paper saying, "This guy can carry gun safely." I left that trailer very...worried.

Well, after this whole permit-getting adventure, I decided to do the next big step in South Florida gun world and go to a gun show! A gun show looks like a comic book show. People dress up in weird outfits, the tables are filled with useless junk, and the one black guy at the show seems out of place. While waiting in line—yes, there was a long line to enter the gun show—the couple in front of me struck me as odd. Not because they were a good looking couple that was really well dressed, but because the man had a Carbine rifle slung over his back and the woman had a lovely Glock clipped to her belt.

Once I got inside, I spent a couple of hours strolling around looking at every kind of weapon; hand guns, shot guns, assault rifles, World War II weapons, swards, knifes, and ninja stars. I was with a friend who was slightly older than me and he told me I could buy a hand gun. I told him I couldn’t because I did not have a permit yet. He shrugged and said, "I have my permit. I can buy the gun right now and then we go to the parking lot and I sign the paper work over to you and you give me the money."

I asked if that was against the law. He smiled and replied, "Nope."

Yeah, that whole statement had some issues. Let's start with this: No background checks. In Florida, at this time at least, you could go to a gun show and buy a gun without the seller doing a background check as long as you had your permit. That seems like a huge flaw in the system. Second, if I was a felon who needed a gun badly I could pay some fool with a permit to buy the gun for me! Another huge flaw in the system. I decided not to buy a gun that day. Mostly because at one point a man in his seventies yanked a Glock .40 pistol from between his legs and asked if I wanted to buy it.

Florida is insane. I lived there for 10 years. Is it as bad as the 1980's during the cocaine wars? No, it's much better now, but that doesn't mean that crazy left.

For posts from The Boneyard, check out our full archive.

Daniel and Sean's Favorite Westerns

Following their interview with author Craig Johnson, Daniel and Sean discussed their favorite westerns.

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For more video clips, subscribe to Writer's Bone's YouTube channel. 

Which Historical Era Would You Most Like to Visit?

Writer's Bone contributor Stephanie Schaefer drops in to talk about what era she'd most like to visit and what she plans on writing about for the website.

For more video clips, subscribe to Writer's Bone's YouTube channel. ​

8 Cartoons That Influenced Me as a Young Writer

By Daniel Ford 

I didn’t need a whole lot of encouragement as a kid when it came to imagination.

I used to pretend to be characters like Dick Tracy, Indiana Jones, and Marty McFly and demand that my family only refer to me by those names. I had a yellow rain jacket and hat for Dick Tracy, a beat up jean jacket and fanny pack for Indy, and a puffy vest with cardboard hover board for McFly.

While live action movies and television shows did a lot to fuel my early writer’s imagination, nothing influenced me more as a young kid as the following cartoons. Feel free to tell us your favorites in the comments section or tweet us @WritersBone.

Winnie the Pooh 

How many children’s cartoons are downright terrifying looking back? A lot of them. I recently watched “The Fox and the Hound” with my 7-year-old nephew and I audibly gasped hearing the mother fox get shot right after the opening credits. My nephew's face showed no trace of emotion. There’s no way I reacted the same way when I was his age because I was intensely frightened by this sequence from Winnie the Pooh’s dream about heffalumps and woozles. It still makes me uncomfortable watching it as a 30-year-old. I had a Winnie the Pooh blanket as a kid, but it wasn’t enough to reassure me that Pooh was just having a nightmare and wasn’t in any danger (also, he was animated). This scene, along with the scene in “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” of the guy getting his heart ripped out, taught me how effective dark moments in a story are in unsettling your audience, but still keep them watching/reading.

Donald Duck 

I watched a lot of Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck cartoons from the 1940s and 1950s. Donald’s vanishing paint made the most lasting impression on my young mind. I was consumed by things that didn’t actual exist (time machines, holy grails, etc.), and I think this scene probably kick started that obsession.

Transformers: The Movie (1986) 

Is it dusty in here, or is it just me? Some of the best storylines are the ones that a beloved main character dies tragically defending his friends and family. Was there a better animated death than that of Optimus Prime in the 1980s Transformers movie? I think not. Tears start immediately after “Do not grieve.” And I groan every time Prime hands off the Matrix of Leadership to professional lackey Ultra Magnus.

The Jetsons 

“Jetsons: The Movie” is one of the first movies I remember seeing in the theater. I didn’t watch the television show religiously, but I remember being awed by how awesome the characters looked on the big screen. It made me want to write stories that were larger than life that had the potential to end up being shown at movie theaters. That life goal is still unchecked as of right now.

An American Tail

Sorry, more crying.

I had a huge Fievel stuffed animal. I can’t talk objectively about this movie (although it is also terrifying in some spots).

I like writing about family; it’s my bread and butter. I come from a colorful family that has provided me with plenty of stories that ended up in my first novel. This movie provided me with an early example of how a story can be effective with a family narrative at its heart.

The Holy Trinity 

I used to get home from elementary school and watch this suburb afternoon lineup of cartoons: “Duck Tales,” “Rescue Rangers,” and “TaleSpin.”

I consider all three part of the reason I ended up liking the crime/mystery genre as a teenager. These cartoons had it all, intrigue, danger, and likeable ensembles.

I also really, really wanted Baloo’s airplane. It’s in my top five fictional vehicles of all time (number one: Han Solo’s Millennium Falcon).

For posts from The Boneyard, check out our full archive.

Farewell Egon: Our Favorite Moments From the Career of Harold Ramis

"I always claim that the writer has done 90 percent of the director's work." Harold Ramis

Actor, writer, producer, and director Harold Ramis has passed away from complications of autoimmune inflammatory vasculitis. He was 69 years old. A press release from his agency read: “His creativity, compassion, intelligence, humor and spirit will be missed by all who knew and loved him.”

The Writer’s Bone team remembers their favorite moments from Ramis’ career:

Hassel Velasco: Harold Ramis is known by most people for his work on the “Ghostbusters” movies, but his body of work expands way beyond the 1984 classic and its 1989 sequel. Ramis was not only an actor; he was also a writer, producer and director.

As a writer, I’d like to believe a lot of my comedy and structure derived from his early work. In 1998, I discovered a new channel on my television, Comedy Central. My parents had just paid for cable and one of the first movies I watched was “Caddyshack.”

I admit it, some of the humor was a little over my head. However, to a 13-year-old boy, a dancing gopher is a sure fire shot comedy-wise. 15 years later, I own the movie and I can comfortably say it gets a lot of playback. I consider it my “feel good” movie.

So, to the writer of “Groundhog Day,” “Bedazzled,” “Year One,” “Caddyshack,” “National Lampoon’s Animal House,” “Stripes,” “Back to School,” “Ghostbusters I & II,” “Analyze This,” “Analyze That;” and to the director of “National Lampoon’s Vacation;” and for his contribution to countless other films and television series, we thank you for all the laughter.

Harold Ramis, you will be missed greatly. Our thoughts are with his family and loved ones.

Sean Tuohy: As much as I loved Harold Ramis in front of the camera (“Ghostbusters,” “Knocked Up”) his true skill was behind the camera. Ramis was a gifted comedy writer who upped the playing field for all of Hollywood.

I grew to love Ramis when I was 14 years old and was given a special copy of “Animal House,” the undisputed king of all college comedies, and I watched a special where Ramis talked about writing the movie.

Ramis spoke about comedy writing the same way baseball coaches talk about the game; they know so much but are always willing to learn more. Ramis always made sure that all his scripts had strong jokes but had stronger characters. “Well, for me, it's the relationship between comedy and life”, Ramis once said regarding his work. His characters were flawed humans who despite all their hard work would always be flawed because his characters were real people and real people always have flaws.

To prove how funny he was, Ramis died when he was 69, knowing it was the funniest number to go out on.

Daniel Ford: Damn it Egon.

I haven’t been this bummed about a celebrity death since John Spencer died in 2005.

I’ve loved everything Harold Ramis has done in front of and behind the camera, but he’ll always be Egon Spengler to me. As I’ve mentioned on this website and our podcast, I was a “Ghostbusters” fanatic as a kid. Back then, all I cared about was a cool group of guys with awesome proton packs running around the city trappin’ ghosts.

As an adult, I’m better able to appreciate the snarky and dark humor of both the original and 1989 sequel. While I enjoyed Bill Murray’s Peter Venkman more as a youngster, it’s Harold Ramis’ Egon that cracks up me up today. Ramis’ comedic timing and delivery of Egon’s staccato egghead lines are comedy gold.

Few things in either movie make me laugh out loud harder than Egon’s face after Peter asks, “You’re not sleeping with it, are you Ray,” and his smirk after singing “Egon” following his partners’ “Do” and “Re.”

Egon also forecasted the death of my chosen profession in 1984. We can also thank Egon for giving men one of the best pick-up lines of all time. “I collect spores, molds, and fungus.” Ghostbusters: "Print is Dead"

RIP Harold Ramis. You had one of the biggest Twinkies in comedy.

Here are a few of our other favorite Harold Ramis moments:

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The Boneyard: How Writer's Bone Would Fix Gotham City

The Boneyard features the best of Daniel and Sean’s daily email chain twice a week. Yes, we broadened the definition of “best” to make this happen. 

Daniel: During a recent podcast recording session, Sean went on a little bit of a rant about Bruce Wayne and Batman. Listen to him argue his case on why Bruce Wayne should fake his own death so Batman can get more done:

The best part about this clip is that it incited a #nerdoff between me, Sean, and Writer’s Bone contributor Dave Pezza. Over/under on the word count of installment of The Boneyard: 3,000.

Dave: Bruce Wayne could do more as Bruce Wayne than as Batman. Wayne could literally hire and train a whole new non-corrupt police force. The best non-superpower wielding super hero could do waaaaay more as a philanthropist than Batman could ever do by putting one single bad guy away at a time, which never works anyway because Gotham prison has a breakout every year.

Sean: Dave has a valid point but I still don't agree. Bruce Wayne could buy a lot of things to help the city of Gotham, but that would never change anything. Bring in a new police force and they will become corrupt regardless what you pay them. Batman is more than a crime fighter, he is a symbol. He lets the people of Gotham know that no matter how bad things get, there will always be someone there to protect them. The Bat signal shines in the skies above Gotham warning the crime element that their evil deeds will be punished. Bruce Wayne, regardless of how much money he has and what he does with it, will always be a man. Men come and go, they die and crumble, but a symbol lives forever.

Daniel: My thing is that Batman is more human than any other superhero because he actually is human. Yes, he's a symbol, but men can be symbols too. That can happen even after they’re dead, much like they tried to make Harvey Dent in the recent trilogy. I don't know if Batman has superpowers like Superman his symbol means as much. I think part of what people like about Batman is that he's one of them, rather than an alien or mutant. The Bat signal is effective because people feel like there is a person out there who isn't corrupt protecting them. I think his humanity matters more than you think. And I think Bruce Wayne keeps him grounded in the real world. Think about how brooding Batman is already. If that's all he is, he might actually blow his brains out or end up in Arkham.

That being said, I agree with your point that Bruce Wayne essentially buying a new system for the city isn't that realistic.

Dave: I would disagree. He creates a symbol to rally a city around a vigilante. Batman just assumes that the city is too broken to fix, so he decides that he can fix it one criminal at a time. False. Gotham city doesn't need another person operating outside the law. It needs sound investors. It needs new infrastructure. It needs Woodwards and Bernsteins. It needs money to be literally thrown at it. “Why does Batman need Bruce Wayne” should not be the question. The question should be, “why does Bruce Wayne need Batman?” Why does Bruce Wayne dress up and get the shit beat out of him just to prove a point and fight a personal battle? He could prove it better bankrolling an ailing city and getting involved in proper politics and political change.

Batman first appeared in Detective Comics in 1939, a year after Superman, as a grittier more human superhero. Obviously, he was a response the monopolistic Superman, but his eventual story showed how broken the U.S. economy had become. It was a mirror to how badly the country had sunk financially and criminally ran rampant, i.e. the Great Depression and Al Capone. Batman's metaphor actually fits our contemporary model better. An American billionaire should use his money to fix a failed American city and give back to the roots that made him, but not as Batman. We need a less vengeful and more fiscally responsible Bruce Wayne. We need a corporation not to hide funds to bankroll a vigilante but to give back to the city by not investing overseas, creating new jobs, and supporting non-corrupt politicians. Gotham, in actuality, needs Wayne Enterprises to cut the city a check like J.P. Morgan did in 1895 for the U.S. Why not invest in a better city than kick the shit out of an old one?

Daniel: I'm slow clapping over here. Nicely done.

Dave: Also, and this is partially borrowed from Cracked.com, Superman is quite different when it comes to disguises. Superman is not a masked alter ego like Batman is for Bruce. Bruce Wayne hides his identity as Batman, however Superman hides his identity as Clark Kent. Clark Kent is a fiction made by Superman to hide his real Kryptonian identity. I am sure there is a metaphor about humanity's inability to accept change or something, but I'm too tired from the Batman post to flesh that out.

For the record, I love Batman. He is by far the most interesting and badass DC superhero. I just like to argue.

Daniel: There are times when I get really into Batman, and there are other times I can't. My favorite is the Batman in Frank Miller's "The Dark Knight Returns." Everything felt right about the character in that comic. The stakes were higher, it wasn't completely gritty, and there was an epic fight with Superman who had turned into a lackey (which is totally possible; which may be one reason Clark Kent remains a journalist. He wants to stay a little bit cynical). I don't mean to say that the stakes aren't always high considering that Gotham has the most realistic set of problems in the DC universe, but nothing elevates stakes like the gunslinger going after one last bad guy. I can't help but think of “High Noon” whenever I re-read that comic.

Sean: You know what, Dave is right.

I can’t think of an argument against the fact that if there was more investment in Gotham that would lessen the street crime. Andrew Carnegie even said that a man spends half his life gathering wealth and then the second half giving the wealth back. Dave made me think of another good point. Why didn't Bruce ever get help after his parents were murdered? Did he ever seek medical attention after witnessing his parents being murdered? Or did Alfred just handle it how I would handle someone asking, "Who wants pie?"

Since we are talking about heroes, who do you think is the best anti-hero? Not just within comics, but in movies, television, comics, and books. Who do you think best defines the anti-hero?

Dave: Oh man, Punisher all the way. He’s the quintessential anti-hero. Ex-cop goes all rogue murder spree after his family gets massacre. You can't blame him, but he is still going around messing people's shit up. Granted those people are raping murderous thugs, but still.

Sean: Agreed. Frank Castle has to be the best anti-hero. The whole Garth Ennis run was awesome. I know people hated the first Punisher movie, but the major issue I saw with it was that the location was all wrong. Tampa? Castle has to be in New York City or somewhere urban. Otherwise, and the fact that it was PG-13, that was a good Punisher movie. A close second to the Punisher would be Snake Plissken from Escape from New York.

Daniel: I actually like the first Punisher movie as well. Mickey Mantle did a serviceable job as the wounded lead character and, hey, any movie that has John Travolta being dragged across a parking lot while he's on fire is a great one. There are so many fictional characters that are great anti-heroes, Tony Soprano, Andy Sipowitz, Dexter, Hannibal Lecter, the Dude, Robert DeNiro in Taxi Driver.

My personal favorite might have to be Michael Corleone in the Godfather movies. His arc gets more tragic every time I watch the films (which is often). He starts out as a war hero with a young girlfriend, and then he's sucked into his family's criminal world somewhat reluctantly. You start to see him embracing the darker side of his persona when he kills the police officer in the Italian restaurant. But it hides it by seeming to be really happy on the lame in Italy. A naked Apollonia helps I'm sure. Once she blows up, I think he's 100% evil. It just clicks. It's all about power and his family. For me, the most haunting scene with him isn't when he kills Fredo. It's when he slams the door in Diane Keaton's face when she comes to visit her kids unannounced. He was shunning her because she had an abortion. Keaton's face when he nonchalantly pushes the door closed is heartbreaking. It's a great moment where you think "why exactly am I rooting for this guy to stay alive?" And then he kills his brother. At least you know he'll be haunted more by that than by anything Kay did. His heart was never really with Kay. Family man Michael wasn't his true character. He was a bad guy at his core and I think he would have been led to it no matter what. I could go on, but I think I've made some kind of a point.

While perusing the Internet to narrow down my pick, an intriguing name popped up that makes a strong argument for a real-life anti-hero: Mark Zuckerberg. Maybe he doesn't have the characteristics of a classic anti-hero, but he may be this generation's real-life version of one. You're not going to see guys like Hunter S. Thompson take that mantle like they once did. Do you think the Millennial generation might get tired of the anti-hero trend and explore other fictional pasts, or do you think that it reflects society overall too much to deviate any time soon?

Sean: This was an awesome short they made a couple years back. It's awesome and really showcased that Thomas Jane could play this part.

I would have never thought of Michael Corleone. I know there is a cut scene where Michael returns to the U.S. and he finds the bodyguard who planted the bomb and kills him. There is a picture of it somewhere, and it shows Michael holding a double barrel shotgun at the hip. It showed how he went full dark side. One thing that they didn’t mention in the movie was the fact that Sonny was really well hung. They hint at it, but it's not brought up. Then again, I don't know how you could bring that up in a movie, no pun intended. The anti-hero, in one shape or another, will always be with us. The anti-hero is a reflection of the darker side of humanity.

Mark? Really? Does he count as an anti-hero? Hmmm, he did do things his way. I don't know if he counts.

Daniel: Well, there is the scene early in the first Godfather where Sonny is plowing one of the bridesmaids. I think it's implied. The bridesmaid actually has Sonny's kid who turns out to be Andy Garcia's character in Godfather III.

Yeah, I agree on what you said about Mark, but really, who else is there. Mark Cuban the basketball owner? The owner of the Brooklyn Nets who spends his time globetrotting and banging supermodels? Snowden? Snowden is an interesting case. I don't think I'm as inclined to support what he did now as opposed to when I was in college because I think he leaked all that stuff for motives that we're wholly patriotic. If they were, I think he'd stand up in court and be a badass instead of running away. Easy for me to say since I'm not the one that would spend time in prison. But you also don't keep lobing grenades into the whole you made. Leak it all out at once and get it out there. Anyway, yeah, I don't know about real-life anti-heroes. I think being human means that all heroes are flawed, and it's tough to even define what a hero is.

Dave: Our generation replaced cowboys, the original U.S. pseudo anti-hero, with bad guys cast as protagonists. I'd like to see us get back to the real old school western anti-heroes, like Eastwood in the “Man With No Name” trilogy. Millennials have mistaken gritty characters who struggle with their own morality in the wake of their actions with "bad guys" who simply accept the villainy free of an appropriately written conscience.

Daniel: Grimly nodding. Why can't anyone get Westerns right anymore? Did every see "Unforgiven" and say, "Well, that's it. It's over." Instead we get fighting robots in "Pacific Rim." Are movies like that this generation's Westerns? Or have superhero movies replaced Westerns and war movies?

There are no good answers to these questions. That bums me out.

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The Boneyard: Why Writing Beginnings Should Make You Feel Great

The Boneyard features the best of Daniel and Sean’s daily email chain twice a week. Yes, we broadened the definition of “best” to make this happen. 

Daniel: We talked about endings not too long ago. I just posted a blog about why I prefer writing beginnings to anything else. In your opinion, what makes a great beginning? Are you of the Elmore Leonard school that avoids talking about scenery or weather or do you prefer setting the scene to your world in a complete way? What devices do you use to suck the reader into your world?

Sean: I love a great opening. I love creating hooks that get the reader pulled into the world that I am creating. Now, there is a fine line you have to walk when creating a good opening. You want to give the reader a little taste of the world, but you don't want to overdo it and have them pull out too soon. You need to allow the reader to peer in to your world for a moment, soak it in, and then give them it full blast.

Hollywood screenwriter Kurt Whimmer is one of the best at writing an opening line. For one of his screenplays, “Exit Zero,” he starts by crashing a U.S. Space Shuttle and then cutting back. Great opening. It pulls the readers into the world and it makes them ask, “What is happening?” The second readers ask that, they are hooked and want to discover what else is going on.

The opening to “Reservoir Dogs” does a great job of that. You have a bunch of tough guys sitting around talking about music and tipping. You know that these men are up to something. You know something is going to happen because a group of guys like this just doesn't sit around and talk all the time. Something is going to happen.

I love writing an opening line that is short, sweet, and deadly. It has to be something that gets the reader's blood pumping and their minds interested.

"They came to kill Tommy after breakfast"

Boom! Why are they coming to kill Tommy? Why wait till after breakfast? Who's killing him? Now the reader has these questions going through their minds and they need to be answered.

What is your mindset on the opening?

Daniel: First of all, you now have to write the rest of that story. You can't just leave me with "They came to kill Tommy after breakfast." My mindset is a lot like yours. I want to draw people into the world I created immediately, but in a way that makes them want to stay and not be able to figure it out in 25 words.

My problem is that sometimes I get stuck on crafting a perfect opening line. In my blog post, I wrote you should take your time making your beginning great, but I think sometimes I spend waaaaaay too much time on it. I get paralyzed to the point where I can't remember how I wanted the rest of the story to turn out. I'll lose details in my mind that may have benefited the story overall.

That being said, nothing gets my creative juices flowing like writing an opening line. There's no amount of alcohol, drug, sex, or caffeine that can reproduce the high I get from really nailing a good opener. When it just flows out of you, there's no better feeling as a writer. Writing can be hard at times, so whenever you can get your creativity to a boil is a great thing. Beginnings do that for me.

Sean: I'll figure out what happens with Tommy but I will say this...you won't see it coming!

You're not alone on getting stuck on making a perfect opening line. It can really ruin the rest of the writing process. Most of the time the opening line comes when you are not even writing. It comes when your mind is busy with something else. How happy are you when you get the opening line? Do you keep writing or do you stop and high-five yourself.

You are right; there so few winning moments in writing but when you get one it's the most amazing feeling in the world.

Daniel: It's one of those moments when you sit back in your chair, sip on your coffee or scotch, and thank your personal invisible deity for making you a writer. And you know immediately when it's great. It's probably the only moment of clarity during my whole process.

There will be lines of dialogue that I think are cool later on, and moments where my plot and character development seamlessly come together. But nothing compares to truly nailing that opener. Every time I get a feeling like, okay, I can do this. This is what I was born to do.

And then of course, you write three more pages of crap and that feeling goes away and you have to make another 10 pots of coffee. But as long as you have a solid start, it makes all that work worth it.

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Sean's Superman Rant

Sean doesn't think Superman should have a job that takes him away from "getting stuff done."

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The Boneyard: What’s Up With Creative People Having Substance Abuse Issues?

The Boneyard will feature the best of Daniel and Sean’s daily email chain twice a week. Yes, we broadened the definition of “best” to make this happen.

Daniel: You ever find you write better drunk? Or at least on some kind of high (caffeine, drugs, sex, etc.)? Some people who attend meetings about stuff like this say that they drove or did something better while under the influence. Is it the same for writers? Is having some sort of heightened or distorted sense of the world better for writing? And is that why so many writers have so many vices?

Sean: A lot of writers have drinking problems. I don't know if the drinking made them better writers. A lot of writers who let the drinking get out of control become worse. MacLean began to drink badly the last five or six years of his life and his work went down the drain. Writers who drink to have good work usually have awful personal lives. The better question is why do so many writers drink? Is it because so much is going on in their minds that they can’t control it in the real world?

Daniel: Great questions as well.

I think in some ways, it’s not being able to handle living in two different worlds. Maybe the world the writer is creating is better than their actual reality, or vice versa. Drinking becomes something of a crutch that eventually overcomes everything else. You're either trying to live in your created world or escape it. Reality measures up or it doesn't. 

And hey, sometimes writers try to force the muse, especially if they think their work is that important or they depend on it for everything. It's like athletes doing performance-enhancing drugs. If someone told you, you could take this and be really successful for a while, but there would be consequences down the line, would you do it?

This from the two guys who preface every podcast with what drink they're consuming.

Sean: In the world we create, we have control over thing. We know the perfect thing to say to the jerk, how to get the woman, and how to overcome our fears. The world is ours, but we can only visit that world, we're not allowed to live there. So once we leave that world we have to confront the real world. We hate the real world. That is why we write.  When you drink or take drugs you are pulled away from the real world. Getting high or drunk numbs you to the world, and allows you to feel free when you are not.  The best feeling in the world is the first few seconds of being high when the real world goes on pause the worry that fills your chest breaks part.

And yes, I would do it. However, regardless of what you do, you have to pay for it at a later date. You always have to pay the devil his due. If you have a great talent and you are able to live off that talent you are going to have to pay for it you may lose your privacy, or a loved one, or something.

Daniel: Damn I love everything you just said. Damn.

I’m repeating this line because I love it so much: "The best feeling in the world are the first few seconds of being high when the real world goes on pause the worry that fills your chest breaks part."

I posted “Why do you think some ‪‎writers‬ (and creative people in general) develop substance abuse issues?” to our social media networks. Here were two responses we got:

Matt: “When your life is entirely based on deadlines, you tend to try anything and everything you can to slow life down. Sadly, one of the major ways to do this is with substances - especially alcohol. Also, when you talk at your laptop all day, you might as well drink until it talks back to you.” 

Jeff: “Because they feel an overwhelming sense of responsibility to deliver material worth retaining. Feeling as though you've failed to any extent in doing something you love can lead to poor decisions, insecurity, depression, and no one is invincible.”

Sean: Also, Philip Seymour Hoffman is dead and I am heartbroken.

He was an amazing actor. I love “Boogie Nights.” He was amazing in that movie. The scene where they are recording the first sex scene and they focus on Hoffman's face and he almost starts to weep is so good.  “Mission Impossible 3? How great is he in that? He is such a great bad guy.  And now he’s dead.  

I'm just gonna miss him.

Daniel: I didn't see “MI:3”, but I have to now. He made every movie he was in better. Lester Bangs in “Almost Famous?” Fantastic. And that serves as maybe one of the most authentic writer movies of all time. “Twister?” Great playing a guy you wouldn't trust to do anything but chase after tornados with Helen Hunt. “Before The Devil Knows Your Dead,” “The Savages,” “Doubt.”

We talked about John Cazale last week, and while Hoffman didn't have that kind of awards run, he maybe had the modern day equivalent of being in a quality movie every time out. I need to go back and re-watch “Capote” because I watched it on a crappy television and the sound was really low. He was just great.

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Episode 2: Shipyard Pumpkinhead Ale

Daniel Ford and Sean Tuohy drink a fall beer during Episode 2 and talk about how the movie "Taken" would be different if Sean was the main character. 

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10 of the Most Underrated Sequels of All Time

Not every sequel is as great as “The Godfather: Part II” or as bad as “The Next Karate Kid.”

A good sequel needs to remind us of why we loved the original movie, but also contain characters and a plot that justifies revisiting the same world.

Here are 10 sequels Daniel and Sean think are underrated and deserve to be as beloved as their predecessors. Feel free to agree or disagree in the comment section or tweet us @WritersBone.

1. “Die Hard: With a Vengeance”

Daniel Ford: My first reaction was that we couldn’t include something as popular and beloved as the third “Die Hard” movie. As always, Sean made a convincing argument and here it is on our list. He also took advantage of my love for New York City porn. Damn him!

Sean Tuohy: Writer story: So when Jonathan Hesleigh, the writer of “Die Hard: With a Vengeance,” was writing the script in New York City, he read about a tunnel being built just outside of the city. He then went to the Federal Reserve in lower Manhattan and asked for a tour. They allowed him to walk in to the vault--one of the largest in the world—and hold gold bars. Then they told him that the subway messed around with their alarm system, so they are removing it. Well, he writes the script in which the bad guys rob the vault using the subway and take the gold up the tunnel to escape. The FBI got their hands on this and held him for questioning. It turns out that at that time someone could have pulled off that robbery just like in the movie.

2. “The Rescuers Down Under”

DF: I had no idea this was a sequel until later in life. I still haven’t seen the first flick. Why bother? This movie is awesome. The cricket yelling pea soup at the restaurant still makes me laugh. I can hear my mother and brother laughing when we first saw it too. That eagle is also majestic as fuck.

ST: I can remember this movie from one of the first summer camps I went to as a kid. We watched it on a small television in a massive room. The scene where the boy rides the bird still sticks out in my mind. It starts off with a heart-racing scene where the kid free falls and then he’s scooped up by the bird.

The artwork is amazing and even the jokes are really funny.

3. “Batman Returns”

DF: Sean and I cover why this movie is so great in a recent installment of The Boneyard, but we could talk about it for days. This sequel has the right amount of seriousness, camp, and black leather. Plus, Danny DeVito as a pitch perfect Penguin. Michael Keaton’s scowl in this movie is on the short list of best scowls of all time.

ST: As Dan said, we can talk about this movie for days. It’s such a stand out in the Batman movie franchise. It’s a movie that understands itself very well. It can be dark and brooding, but then switch on the camp and humor. Also, who didn’t want an army of rocket-throwing birds?

4. “Airplane 2”

DF: Sean, take over, I’m too busy laughing at Simon turning to jelly.

ST: While Dan is busy rolling on the floor and grabbing his side—and I’ll be joining him soon enough—I have to point that this movie is one of the best comedies ever made. From William Shatner’s scenes as the moon base commander to the “Out of coffee?!?!” scene, Airplane 2 will leave you, well, just like Dan.

5. “Blade 2”

DF: My friend Steve-O and I were on a big vampire kick at one point. We tore through “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” “Angel,” and the three “Blade” movies. I’m sure all of this happened during one weekend. The second movie is clearly the best. It has everything you want, villain progression, haunted protagonist, and cool fight scenes that could end up with someone chowing down on someone else’s neck.

ST: My version of "Blade 2" would have had Blade going down to a sun-soaked island to get his groove back with the help of a sexy young vampire. But wisely, the studio didn't listen to me and they instead went with Guillermo del Toro to helm the edgier sequel. The movie is filled with action, awesome fight scenes, and a stone-faced Wesley Snipes. Sadly, they lost their way with the third film...

6./7. “Back to the Future Part II” and “Back to the Future Part III”

DF: I can’t talk objectively about these movies. I spent too much time in a vest carrying around a cardboard hover board for that to happen. I also went through a phase of demanding people call me Marty. And after seeing “Back to the Future Part III,” I wore a black, plastic cowboy hat and forced people to call me Clint. The town dance scene is just fantastic. “The Doc can dance?”

ST: What can you say about these movies that hasn’t already been said? Not much, but I’ll give it a shot here. I made my parents spend hours on the “Back to the Future ride” in Florida. I had the toys, I watched the TV shows, and I even wore some clothes with the logo. But what I always took away from the movies was the relationship between Doc and Marty. Those two faced life and death, one case of incest, and countless bad guys, but always believed in one another.

8. “Homeward Bound 2”

DF: I told myself I wouldn’t cry…dammit. “It’s a thing of beauty when Chance is on duty!” I tear up every time I hear that. Fun fact: Pa Walton (aka Ralph White) voiced Shadow in this one because Don Ameche died in 1993. Also, did Sally Field method act while voicing the cat?

ST: Wait a second. Pa Walton is dead? When did this happen?!?! This is heartbreaking, but I will try and hold back tears on this one. WHY?!?!? Why did you take Pa away?!?!

He had so much to give!!!

DF: Sean, Pa Walton is still alive...the other guy is dead.

ST: Oh, well then. Um, this is a good movie.

DF: Another fun fact about Ralph White. He ran for Congress three times and lost. He lost twice to Sonny Bono's widow.

ST: Wow. How is that not a movie? Pa Walton versus Sonny Bono's widow for Congress. I would watch that!

9. “An American Tail: Fievel Goes West”

DF: Pretty sure my younger brother and I wore out this VHS. Tiger training to become a dog is outstanding, especially the part where he’s strutting around and squeaking at the same time.

ST: I caught this flick at a friend’s house one night. It stands out because it was my first taste of the big ol’ West. Also, right after this, I watched my first “Naked Gun” film.

10. “Ghostbusters 2”

DF: One of the best logos for a sequel ever.

And this movie was so…weird. I remember being way more creeped out by this movie than the original. But how can you not love the scene where they get the slime to dance? And, “You’re not sleeping it with, are you Ray?”

ST: The Ecto-1. Do I have to say more? Yes? Good, because I want to. It was an awesome car filled with an awesome group of guys who put ghosts in their places. I have to say the best scene is watching the Titanic arrive in to port and the passenger debark through the gash.

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The Boneyard: What Fictional Character Would You Invite to Your Birthday Party When You Were 5 Years Old?

The Boneyard will feature the best of Daniel and Sean’s daily email chain twice a week. Yes, we broadened the definition of “best” to make this happen.

Daniel: If you could have had any fictional character show up to your birthday party when you were 5 years old, who would it be and why?

Sean: I have so many different ideas running through my mind right now. I would say Batman, but I feel the second he sees my parents he would get really upset. 

Daniel: My first instinct was Superman, but I started to think of all the fictional characters I loved at that age. There would have been way too many choices for my 5-year-old brain to process. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the Berenstain Bears, Winnie the Pooh, and Marty McFly from “Back to the Future” would have all been welcome at my birthday bash. However, someone would have had to pick up the mess from my brain splattering across my living room. There isn’t enough scotch guard in the world that would have withstood the amount of times I would have pissed myself if any of them would have shown up (or, you know, existed in the real world).

The choice would have been impossible after I started reading at the breakfast table. I read Garfield anthologies religiously, so I could have easily imagined how cool it would be if the fat, orange cat was cracking wise while torturing my black Lab during one of my birthday parties. I would have even made my mother make me a lasagna-inspired birthday cake. I also read a lot of condensed, illustrated novels like Treasure Island and Robin Hood, so one birthday could have had a pirate/archery theme. And I think the Boxcar Children would have made strong candidates because I read them quite a bit while I was on a Rice Krispies Treats cereal kick. The sugar high mixed with kids having adventures on their own may have made my decision for me.

However, I wore a Superman cape from birth until yesterday, so he’d still probably be at the top of my invite list. And as “I Love Lucy” taught us, he’s available!

Sean: What a minute, are you saying the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the Bernstein Bears, Winnie the Pooh, and Marty McFly are not real?

Nooooooooooooo!

I agree on your list, but I would add in the Ghostbusters as well. If they have pulled up in front of the house in the Ecto-1 I would have wet myself. Dan Ford style.

It is odd that as adults—sadly, that is what we are now—that we still believe in these worlds. I mean, “Ghostbusters” still feels real to me. That world of ghost hunting, wisecracking, and demons still feels real to me that at any moment I believe I could look to my left and see the Echo-1 racing down Commonwealth Avenue.

Do you think any of those fictional worlds will ever fade away and seem less real to us?

Daniel: I can't believe I left out the Ghostbusters. I had a toy “Ghostbusters” firehouse, a toy “Ghostbusters” proton pack (with trap), and I once went to school wearing a “Ghostbusters” armband. My mother let me get away with it because at least I wasn't chasing down her car in the parking lot because I didn't want to go to school. I can't believe she still speaks to me.

And I'd have invited the movie “Ghostbusters” and the cartoon show “Ghostbusters.” I loved that cartoon. There was also an animated version of “Beetlejuice” and “Back to the Future” at one point. I remember McDonald's Happy Meals came with toys from both shows. I was so excited to get a DeLorean toy one day. All I wanted back then was a time machine. My friends and I would actually develop blueprints for one.

To answer your question, no, the worlds we've loved all these years will never fade. It speaks to what you said in our first email chain. Once you make a connection with a book or film, it's really hard to break it. My friend Steve-O and I spent much of last weekend watching episodes of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and “Angel.” It was less about the plot and characters this time and more about remembering the times we watch the shows in college when we didn't have jobs or money (at least now we have jobs). They don't fade because they offer an oasis from real life, which to be honest, is a drag.

Sean: You had the trap?!?! I wanted the trap and the fire house so badly. I made my own firehouse with some cardboard.

Yeah, wow, after a stunt like that I would have left you in a parking lot. This is why I am not a parent.

And, yes! There were two versions of the “Ghostbusters” cartoon, one with the original lineup and then another with a new cast, one of whom was in a wheel chair. I remember the intro the both “Beetlejuice” and “Back to the Future.”

I never got the toy from McDonald's. I tried, but I missed it. And I really want to know if your time machine blue prints worked.

"Offer an oasis from real life." That is a perfect metaphor! I love popping on a television show or movie from the past and remember a different period in my life. Some are happy, some are not so happy, and for a few moments I relieve those moments.

What I miss is the excitement of finding a new movie that opens your eyes. I feel like that stage is now gone because we have seen so much. I will never be able to relive the excitement I felt seeing "The French Connection” for the first time. Which I am okay with now because now I can create my own stories that will excite someone else.

Daniel: My younger brother used to come to visit me in New York City and all we'd do is watch "The West Wing." Everyone said, "You're in New York, why not go out and do something you nerds!" Well, for one, we didn't have any money. Good times cost money. And secondly, that's just what we did. We didn't have to say anything or manufacture a bonding moment. It just happened naturally. We'd get breakfast sandwiches from a deli down the street and then watch 12 straight hours of walk and talk.

I also used to watch a lot of "The West Wing" while writing. Something about the tone, the lighting and the subject matter got me in the mood to write. While I certainly can get tired of Sorkin's plots, I will never get sick of his staccato dialogue. It's so rich and fulfilling. People may not talk like that in real life, but they should. There's an energy there that's lacking in day-to-day conversation.

My girlfriend Stephanie—a damn good writer whose work our readers will be raving about in short order—wanted to add something to this chain. Considering our website has more testosterone than a Texas rodeo I figured a little estrogen would go a long way.

Stephanie: Snow White came to my second birthday party. She was pretty legit, but I think Ariel, Flounder and Sebastian would sing a better "Happy Birthday." Or I’d invite the cast of the Muppets, minus Miss Piggy because I don't want a diva pig to be the center of attention at my party. Maybe I’d just invite just Kermit and Fozzie Bear because he's cuddly.

Daniel: Would any of you have invited anyone from “Full House?” A young Daniel Ford might have invited Stephanie because of the huge crush I had on her back in the day. She might bring cocaine though, even at age. Punky Brewster might have also been on my invite list.

By the way, the “Full House reunion on Jimmy Fallon’s late night show recently is awesome. How great is it that Uncle Jessie's fake mullet pales in comparison to the epic mullet he had back then. I guess mullets are forever.

Sean: The Muppets are awesome and I would have them at my birthday as well. I would make Fozzie Bear tell dirty jokes.

Yes! I would have Joey come to the party. He’s not my favorite, but I feel like he would be the most fun, and Stephanie because I had a crush on her too. Have you seen her lately? I mean, considering she battled drug additcion, had two kids, and survived a couple bad breaks up, she good.

Mullets are like the bad guys at the end of horror films: they never die.

Daniel: I spent several minutes (okay, it was longer than that) trying to talk myself out of thinking she was still attractive. But my Google search tells me that you are indeed correct. She does hold up well besides the drug addiction and childbirth. However, she did name her memoir unSweetined. Deducting major points for that. Why not just, How Stephanie Tanner Became a Junkie and Then Grew Up? I'd read that book.

Rachel (Sean’s girlfriend and future Writer’s Bone contributor): I think your website has plenty of estrogen if you ask me.

Daniel: Dynamite drop in.

Stephanie: As far as the “Full House” characters, I think everyone would feel uncomfortable if three guys in their thirties showed up to an unrelated 5 year old's birthday party. Unless they showed up in “Flintstones” attire like this:

That's a game-changer.

Rachel: I'll go with the entire cast of “Full House.” I’d especially invite Comet because when I was 5 years old, I did not have a dog and I used to sit on my parents bed to watch the show and imagine owning a golden retriever who would sit with me and watch it.

Also, I’d invite Mary Kate and Ashley. I know they aren't fictional, but specifically when they were detectives in "The Adventures of Mary-Kate & Ashley."

Also, I’d consider the yellow Power Ranger because when I was 5 years old, I got into a very heated discussion with my next-door neighbor about which one of us was the yellow Power Ranger.

Daniel: Awesome. The yellow Power Ranger choice is very PC. Not many white girls in Boston clamoring to be the Asian female Power Ranger I imagine.

Sean: That actress died in car crash. Sadness.

Daniel: Yeah, just saw that. I had to Google her because I originally thought she was black. Two black people on a television show, what was I thinking?

Sean: Come on man, it was the mid-1990s. That would never happen.

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Friday Banter: More Superman Talk

Daniel Ford and Sean Tuohy once again chat about the Man of Steel. This will be a recurring theme.

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The Boneyard: Superman Movies, Mandy Moore, and Backyard Jurassic Park

The Boneyard will feature the best of Daniel and Sean’s daily email chain twice a week. Yes, we broadened the definition of “best” to make this happen.

Sean: I forgot to show this to you. It's Max Landis, John Landis' son, talking about Superman. It’s really well made:

Daniel: I remember the Booster Gold part from reading the book. "You look fucked." Hilarious.

And yeah, I also remember reading the part where Doomsday watches the wrestling match on television as a kid and thinking it was the greatest thing ever. I had chills. Knowing what was going to happen, I thought, wow Superman is so fucked. And the beating he gets in the city is awesome. It makes the recent Superman movie look like a sandbox fight between toddlers. Every time he talked to Lois, he looked worse and worse. 

Superman dying and the world figuring out what to do after that was a cool concept. But the four Supermen were lame. Except for maybe the Cyborg because he made you think he was the real deal for a while there. I wanted Superboy to fall into a lake of Kryptonite immediately right after sucking off Darkseid and Lex Luthor at the same time. I still hate that character.

Also lame: the Guardian. He might be one of the stiffer characters I had no idea existed. That's right, no one cares about him. What is he trying to be a British newspaper (God, that's a terrible joke)?

And Mandy Moore could be 400 pounds and chain-smoking cigar-smoking babies and I would still have her on my celebrity list.

I just read the video description. I totally forgot the part where Pa Kent has a heart attack and goes to heaven. And that's the start of Superman coming back. That storyline came out of someone's brain. And then was green-lit by another brain who thought it was a good idea. Stuff that Aaron Sorkin writes on bathroom walls would be better than that idea. Hell, stuff that you write on bathroom walls to attract older men would have more brainpower behind it than that storyline.

Sean: The Death of Superman sent ripples through the pop culture landscape when it happened. But I agree that Superboy is a dick and just useless. However, the image of him falling in to a green lake of Kryptonite with fresh cum still coating his mouth is pretty funny.

What were your thoughts on the last Superman movie?

To me, Superman will always be the 1978 version. That sums up everything about the comic book and the Superman world. It was a near-perfect comic book movie.

It took me a couple of minutes to get the Guardian joke...it was...good...

I agree about Mandy Moore. She could punch me in the face, belittle me as a man, and then slap my momma, but if her bed was open to me I'd be cool with it.

Someone who cared more about money then about story created the post-Death of Superman storylines.

"Wait, we killed him? Shit, he made us mad money. Bring him back!"

"But sir, we can't just bring Superman back. He's dead."

"BRING HIM BACK!"

Daniel: Superman I and Superman II are perfect movies, never mind comic book movies. Comic book movies have become way too involved and too dark. After The Dark Knight, comic book movies are kind of a drag. It works for Batman because brooding and pining are things intrinsic to that character. I don't need to see a depressed bunch of Avengers, or a melancholy, tortured Iron Man, or a Superman trying to find himself. I get that you need to make these guys somewhat relatable, but knock it off with so many special effects. It only works when it adds to the story. To me, the effects in Superman II are way more believable than anything now. It just looked right.

Take the Star Wars prequels. They are awful because of hammy writing, horrible acting performances, and overdone special effects. Guess what? The originals had some pretty hammy writing, so-so acting, but special effects that looked real. Maybe we go back to puppets, I don't know. But look at the lightsaber fights back then and the ones in the prequels. Maybe it’s a reaction to our shortened attention spans, but the lightsaber fights in the originals were full of dialogue, actual swordplay, and happened for a reason. The prequel fights were all flash. At the end of Attack of the Clones (hold me Sean like you did at the lake on Naboo), Count Dooku and Anakin have a lightsaber fight that at one point looks like it is just flashing red and blue lights in front of their faces. Worst. Fight. Ever. My younger brother and I had better choreography in the backyard with Wiffle ball bats wrapped in varying shades of electrical tape.

The Yoda versus the Emperor fight is cool in Episode III because it takes some time to develop. And someone should have really offed Yoda early on and everything probably would have ended up fine. Boy, did that green little shit drop the ball. How about you stop writing for fortune cookie manufacturers and start cutting people's hands off.

Sean: I agreed on that those two movies stand the test of time. It's everything you want in a story. They are so well made. The Dark Knight did the same thing to comic book movies that Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns did to comic books. Both were dark and brooding stories that pushed the limits of their medium. But because they did so well, everyone else started copying him and then it got boring. Frank Miller has said that he wishes he had never done that to his comic book. He feels as if it ruined a lot of great stories.

One comic book I wish they would do is Green Arrow: The Long Bow Hunters. That is a great story line. Oliver Queen loses his riches, moves to another city with his girl, and starts fighting crime his way. Fantastic. It's the right mix of dark and comic. But since the Green Arrow is not a big enough star in the comic world, they won't do it. I will say this; the television show Arrow is not bad. It's far from the best, but its good.

A New Hope still looks amazing. The movie built such a powerful world that it will never look bad. The new ones are done in front of green screen, so I know it’s more of a cartoon. Puppets will always seem real to me. Maybe it’s a kid thing, I don't know, but they will.

Jurassic Park! I feel that movie still stands the test of time as well. The T-Rex attacking the parked cars, the raptors running amok in the kitchen, and the ending scenes still look great. I could watch those over and over again.

Daniel: I remember seeing Jurassic Park in the theater. Mind-blowing. That flick and Apollo 13 were two of my favorite early movie going experiences growing up. I had a Jurassic Park action figure set. I turned my backyard into a Jurassic Park-like set up with some friends of mine from around the neighborhood.

Are kids doing any of that stuff today? We spent hours out there running around like idiots. It was glorious. It's all animated now right? They all hang out on World of Warcraft right? How do you think you'd be different if you were a kid right now as opposed to back then?

Sean: I vividly remember watching Jurassic Park in the theaters. I hid under my seat when during the raptor scenes. I was so scared and excited at the same time. I had never seen anything like it before and from then on I was in to movies.

My backyard was Jurassic Park, The Road Warrior, and the battlefield for my soldiers and tanks. The backyard and the carpet were places that I turned into new worlds and landscapes.

I'm not sure about your question. I don't see kids outside as much as I used to. We spent hours on our bikes riding around and playing in backyards.  The outside world is visited daily by sitting in front of a computer screen of some kind.

Would I be different? Um…maybe...no, I think my parents would have pushed the outside time. I was a fat kid so they were always pushing me outside. "Go out and run or you'll have a heart attack when you are 14!"

How about you? Would you be an outdoor kid or no?

Daniel: I think I would still have been a baseball guy no matter what, so that would have pushed me outside. I am glad Sega didn't have as much of a pull keeping me and my brother indoors as the newer games do for kids. Don't get me wrong, we played a lot of NHL '96, but that was after being outside all day.

Sadly, it's a safety thing too. All these shootings make parents keep their kids inside and safe as possible. There was some report recently that said kids were actually connecting and socializing more with each other through the Internet and social media. The fear was that kids were losing social skills because of all this tech. It turns out that kids are using them more to interact since they have limited ability to hang out with the kids around them. It's not that they necessarily want to be on everything all day, it's just that it's the only place they can be kids without a SWAT team surrounding them. Kind of wild.

Moral of the story: adults ruin childhoods.

Sean: Sega was king for a while. It was hard not to stay inside.

Adults do ruin childhoods, but kids can be massive jerks. I am still reeling from stuff that other kids said to me...15 years ago. I never had an adult make fun of me so badly I had to go home and cry.

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Episode 1: Test Drive #1

Daniel and Sean test out their podcast equipment by being huge nerds.

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Would You See a 1980s "Masters of the Universe" Sequel?

Sean Tuohy joins Daniel Ford on the phone to talk about Masters of the Universe, his interview with Derek Haas, and why he's not wearing any pants.

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